Over-Thinking

Quote: “It must be exhausting to be you.”  Susan Thies.  My friend who has climbed Mount Kilimanjaro, literally needs about five hours of sleep a night, just got back from Israel, and is a whirlwind of do-gooding adventure and activity.  I took it as a compliment, but I’m not sure that’s how it was intended.
Imagine me clinging to the side of a cliff, my feet on the very thinnest lip, rocks falling around, my fingers bleeding as I try to scramble for better purchase.  Then the camera pans out and you see me, another me – with a bullhorn – standing on the ground 12 INCHES below saying, “Just step down, Sherri.  It’s a one foot drop.”  The other me, the cliff Sherri, shaking her head.  “I’m not sure how long I can hold on anymore.”  That’s been my week.

I have inconsequential choices – AND I KNOW THEY ARE STUPID — but I’m stuck endlessly going back and forth, pros and cons.  Analysis Paralysis.  So, I’m going to do it right here: Sherri-to-Sherri.  And then it will be over.  Because my mid-week idea that it would be easier to make decisions if I drank more coffee did not mean that it was easier to make decisions.  It meant I was twitching in bed at 2am debating the pros and cons of getting out of bed to go down to the study to write out my questions.  So I didn’t forget any…except wouldn’t it be better if I did forget the questions because then I ….  It’s frustrating to see someone act or think like that.  AND SHE IS ME.

So, here goes.

Sherri on the cliff says:  I have a little spot on my nose, should I go to the doctor?  I’m too young for skin cancer and I use sunscreen all the time, but somehow it doesn’t seem right.

Sherri with the bullhorn: Yes, go to the dermatologist and get it biopsied.

Done

Sherri:  I was thinking about buying tickets to the Meyerhoff to see The Tao of Drumming.  It looks like an exciting performance, but Husband was lukewarm.  I don’t want to plan it and then I feel responsible if he doesn’t like it.

Sherri:  Just buy the tickets.  Can’t be responsible for Husband.  If he doesn’t want to go, invite someone else.

Done

Sherri:  Should I go to another yoga class on Friday?  I like it and I do have to use up the class card before April 3rd.

Sherri:  No.  You had nachos and a bottle of wine last night while watching Whitney.  Get your ass on the elliptical and burn 500 calories.

Done

Sherri: I still haven’t pruned the plum tree out front.  It’s a good height for where it is – shading the library, but what if the plums are up too high to reach?

Sherri: Too late, spring is here.  Besides, last two years crazy wind blew most of the green plums off the tree.  You’ll be lucky if you have that problem. 

Done (by not doing)

Sherri:  Is it appropriate to ask Anna to take the truck in for its oil change?   She’s the primary driver, but she might feel uncomfortable with the situation.

Sherri: Anna is very capable.  She will tell you if she is uncomfortable.  You make the appointment, give her 45 minutes off early to do it, and handle the payment.  Worry about the minivan’s oil change.  That’s you.

Scheduled for 2pm today.

Sherri:  I didn’t shave my legs last night because the bathroom smelled like bleach…

Sherri: Stop!  Shave your legs while showering after your elliptical exercise.  You are not on Survivor or stuck in a cabin in a blizzard in Montana.  Keep your legs shaved.

Sherri: I’ve lost excitement about this section of my story because the literary agent said it seemed a bit silly and off the deep end.

Sherri:  She based that on two sentences in a summary.  Stop sulking and write the actual part out before you give up because it’s not good enough. You’re 43K words in. Do not stop now.  Meet your goal for the week – stop working on your blog and write 800 more words before the kids get home from school.

In progress

Sherri: I saw an instructional meeting offered for voice over acting.  That’s always been a dream of mine – voices for animated movies or being the voice on audio books.  But, I don’t know what this meeting would tell me that I don’t already know.  Hard to break into, helps if you are in L.A. or New York, a lot of times *real* actors get first shot anyway.

Sherri: A Dream and you’d even think of not going?  Stop being stupid.  Send in the registration and check.

Done

Sherri: I’ve decided to attend the Gettysburg Review Workshop. It’s during the last week of school and close enough that I can drive and the price works. 

Sherri:  And?

Sherri: That’s it.

Sherri: Well then fill out the application, write a deposit slip, send in a sample of your writing and let’s go!

Going to Do
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s